hope-724931_640

Things will get better!

Hi. When I was 6 months old my battle began. I had a hair pulling disorder called trichotillomania. It’s very rare for someone to get it but even more rare for babies to get it. But I had it. I was bald up until I was 10 and bullied my whole life. The main thing I was called was a boy. I struggled a lot to become a normal child. I had extreme moods. When I had just turned 13 I started becoming very depressed and was still being bullied but for different reasons. But the end of 2015 I started self harming. It started off as a little cut here and there on my hand then things turned for the worse. My parents finally found out and got help. But not enough. I ended up trying to kill myself a couple months later. That’s when I really got help. I was then diagnosed with bipolar disorder 1. I was finally on medication and I had lots of support streams. But once again that wasn’t enough. I attempted suicide for the second time a few months later and went to a crisis stabilization unit. I was considered out patient.  I was put on more meds and was getting better but things still weren’t right. I was still self harming and I ended up attempting suicide 8 more times. So by the fifth attempt I went to a psychiatric hospital for two weeks in September. I spent my 15 birthday there. But little did my family know, that was only my 8th time not 11th. Things have been very hard. I’m still self harming but I’m as stable as I have ever been. I’ve been homeschooled all my life but was bullied in church. I’m still getting bullied here and there but not as much. Although everyone at my church knows what’s going on with me since I am the pastors daughter. I’m on lots of medications but I’m feeling better. The only reason I’m writing this is because i want whoever is reading this to know that things will get better. It’s hard and it may not seem like it but it is. I am down right now but I’ll get better. I know it. So thanks for reading and I hope that maybe I helped someone. 🙂

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